First, thanks for finding your way here to my page!
For nearly all of my life, I’ve labeled myself as uncreative;
a terrible artist…even with stick figure drawings,
an awful singer…even alone in the shower,
a poor cook…I can only follow a recipe and still I mess up,
and a bad writer…I don’t know enough vocabulary to write well AND it takes me so long!
On the other hand, sports and athleticism came naturally to me so I easily gravitated towards that. It’s really easy to stick with things that you’re good at! But the truth is, I’ve always wanted to be more creative. While I put in the time and energy to get better at sports, I never put in the ‘practice’ needed to be more creative. My goal is to finally change that with this blog. I’m committed to practicing my writing here and hopefully some of you will come along for the ride.
Ok, so what’s with the Title?
For almost a dozen years, I worked as a Coach in an amazing gym in Brooklyn, NY. It’s not your typical gym because we had an incredibly strong community where I literally knew all 700+ members’ names. And not just their names, but details about their lives. Sure I knew about spouses, kids, pets and occupations but also things such as favorite vegetables, best vacations, last night’s dinner, most embarrassing moments and so much more. We all got to know these details because we started each class with a Question of the Day (QOD). It was truly one of my favorite parts of class and something I miss to this day.
One day, the QOD was “What would be the title of your Memoir?” Everyone went around and shared great titles, (people are so creative and funny!) and when it came to my turn, I immediately said You Can’t Blame Your Mom for Everything.
Maybe you’re thinking, “wow, you must really dislike your Mom!” Well, that’s not the case. I love my mom tremendously and even left Brooklyn in 2020 to move to Ohio and live within 12 minutes of her! But like most relationships, there have been a lot of ups and downs over the 44 years of my life.
When I was younger, I did want to blame her for so many things. Maybe these will be things I cover in some future posts, but maybe not. It’s easy to have a scapegoat when things go wrong and for me, this often subconsciously fell on my mom. I’m sure these feelings have contributed to our lack of a ‘close’ relationship. As I got older, and finally more mature, I came to the realization that it was unfair to put all of my burdens on her. She is not to blame for things that haven’t gone as expected in my life, whether good or bad. I’m my own independent person, have been since 18yrs old, and I need to take ownership of the events in my life.
So when thinking of my Memoir title, You Can’t Blame Your Mom for Everything seemed appropriate. Not only does it hold meaning for me, but I think it can offer others the opportunity to reflect on their own relationships, and who in their lives might be receiving some unnecessary blame.
Maybe this will someday become print and you’ll find it in the Self-help section. Most likely though, this will just live here as my virtual memoir. Yes, I plan to share personal stories some sad, some happy, some devastating, some joyous and all with a side of humor. I’m sure there will also be some random thoughts thrown in, as well as a haiku or two.
one more thing to read,
I'll do my best to engage,
feedback helps me grow.